Moonlit Musings From An Everyday Hellhound

  I thought I had everything. I thought I could trust those closest to me. Everything I thought I knew, was wrong. It was just oh so wrong. I had a family who loved me, friends who adored me. I did well in school, kept to myself, worked hard at a job I loved. It was during the summer of my high-school graduation where my life literally turned upside down. I went from being ‘normal’ (or whatever the closest thing to ‘normal’ was) to something else entirely.         My family wasn’t poor, in fact we were well off. Not only were we well off, but we were all close. Something that was uncommon. My father Michael was an accountant. He was an average built man, with a height of 5’9” and roughly 175 pounds. He wasn’t jacked up with muscle, but he could still definitely hold his own. Michael had chocolate hair and brown eyes. My mother, Ruby, was the manager of the towns flower shoppe. She was roughly 5’5” and 125 pounds. She too, was athletic with aubu...

She chose to believe in magic, because the world already had  enough villains and monsters, everything was a chapter, not the end. She vowed to be her own saviour, no white steed needed, no need for a knight in shining armour, when she was her own dork in humor. She vowed to re-write every tragedy the universe tried to stick her in, because going down without a fight wasn't in her genetocs as a way to win. She chose to believe in magic, because the world already had enough villains and monsters, everything was a chapter, not the end. No more rose colored glasses or flocking like sheep, she was meant to forge her own oath, not sit and weep. A voice she had, and use it well finally she had found her backbone, no longer a damsel, or a naive little girl, but a mere queen upon her throne.  She chose to believe in magic, because the world already had enough villains and monsters, everything was a chapter, not the end.

There were days where she longed to feel anything. Other days she longed to feel nothing. Always a monster, never a friend, never to be trusted  and never to trust. She howled to the moon, breaking the silence of her thoughts, the night, breaking the mockery hidden behind fake smiles and empty pleasantries.  Forever a moon child, with a stronghold of beliefs where she often stands alone. Was being alone truly a burden? Why no, it's just a matter of perspective.

She once thought  a change of scenery would be everything she needed  to survive and thrive... new locations,  new senses,  new instincts forged in a sense  of what used to be certainty.  She was just a pawn in so many versions of the same game, drowning and chained in empty promises  and meaningless vows where the only held weight when she was of any use then discarded. If only she could see  beyond the masks and stop believing  in happily-ever-after.  

  She was hellfire and a little bit hurricane, burning bridges she once crossed for the same people who abandoned her and fed her empty promises. Raging winds and tidal waves caused destruction in her wake, putting out the fires of anger and betrayal. Her eyes showed facade, and only those who could withstand  the storm would be allowed to survive.

When I go, I will wreck you and all those surrounding you, a black plague of unrequited love. Fevers of passion will seep deep down into the bones and blood, sweat and tears shall pour from my pores.  Shallow breaths from asthma attacks when words fail you, when actions aren't enough and there is no remedy in sight. No, the pulse quickening in your chest means nothing, because you're the only one that feels -- a ghost of what could've been haunts your mind and makes you wish and dream of things unknown.